“And I’m Like…” Reviewing WWE Summerslam 2015

“And I’m Like…” Reviewing WWE Summerslam 2015

What a day yesterday folks. We were busy at the restaurant, double what we did the day before. I was able to get a quick NXT review done but not a Paying Dues. Summerslam was four hours plus a pre-show so I didn’t have much time to do anything else but watch wrestling and talk about wrestling. Like in Mortal Kombat Annihilation, they only fight or talk about fighting. Well… Onto the wrestling.

Jon Stewart Promo- This fell flat for me. Stewart made a good joke “I’ve been covering politics for 16 years, it’s nice to be in the real world.” He would go on to talk about being a wrestling fan, said he wanted to interview Brock but needed someone to help him out just in case. Foley comes out, a hilarious misunderstanding ensues with Foley thinking it was The Rock being interviewed not Brock. Nothing happens after that.

And I’m Like… So happy I didn’t have to hear a “Yabba-Dabba” chant or anything ROCK. I watched the Daily Show religiously, I do not think this was good, at the same time I don’t have a better idea for Jon’s talents. 

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

I wish I had time to rewatch the event and give more of an opinion during these matches, but working 12 hour days and sleeping for 8 gives me four hours exactly to do stuff, I’m not trying to miss Raw tonight.

These two were surprising as the first match of the show. My buddy and I got into a conversation about who is more over, Orton or RKO. We agreed that Orton is good, neither of us like or enjoy him. He is good though, his timing is on point, he has worked his moveset into the flow of the match so seamlessly that it’s hard to pick out when his moves of doom happen.

There was a spot in the match where Sheamus was in position to maybe receive a rope hung ddt. He happened to reverse it into his Ten Beats of the Bowery, it was the same move just on opposite sides of the ropes. That little bit of variety did wonders for my enjoyment of the match. Sheamus followed that by getting RKO’d but showed his ring generalship by rolling out of the ring.

The match ended with Sheamus hitting a Brogue kick on Orton, Randy stumbling from the corner and getting a second Brogue.

And I’m Like… Not mad at it, coulda done without it. What I’m saying is my life wouldn’t have changed the slightest if this was any different or didn’t happen. I don’t know of anyone that was excited for this. My buddy and I were talking about how there needs to be ‘blood feuds’ like Brock/Taker. Recently it’s just, “you cost me this one match, the other matches don’t matter cause I only care about this one match. 

WWE Tag Team Championship Match- The New Day vs. Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores vs. Prime Time Players (c) 

One thing of note is we have four teams in this match and they all wear matching gear and have team names. That signals there is a tag division, not sure what the storyline is though. Same problem with the divas. I feel like being in WWE Creative is similar to spinning plates. Each wrestler in a storyline represents a plate, you can only have so many spinning at one time. Luckily for us, the match was exciting enough to not warrant a story.

New Day stole the match, they started with a promo about how hip-hop started in the south, which should have gotten more heat as how hip-hop was founded in New York, maybe it woulda worked better in the Bronx. The New Day then covered Jay-Z and Alicia Keys’ Empire State of Mind. “Let’s hear it for Neeewww Daaaay, Negativity won’t effect us, clap cause it’s infectious Let’s hear it for New Daaaay, those tag teams are booty, yeah I said booty, let’s hear it for NEW DAAAAY!” I was singing that all morning. I totally dig New Day taking hip-hop songs and putting there own lyrics in. Maybe they can do a Oh baby weeeee got what you need, we are called New Day.

The other teams came out and it became a very by the book, yet fun match. Everyone of the eight men got in the match for a good amount of time. There was a small spot fest that had everyone jumping and bumping to the outside. There were a few screw ups but that is kind of to be expected with so much happening with so many people.

The finish was beautiful, it was a build to the hot tag to Titus O’Neil. He and the person Michael Cole called “Fernando” though we really don’t know do to the chaos, wrestled a bit. Sweet interaction with El Torito and Xavier Woods pictured above. There was a set up to a tower of doom that had Fernando falling off the turnbuckle and Diego quickly filling his spot. As the Matador was getting superplexed Kofi tapped his heel to tag in. Titus hit Clash of the Titus on some Matador and Kofi snuck in for the win.

And I’m Like… Let’s hear it for New Day! All 10 men did the best that they could with what was given to them. The months long build was rough but this match came off very well. My wife noticed how Big E  LOVES to do his dance. She says it seems like he just zoned out, all he wants to do is dance and not wrestle. I’m excited for the New Day’s second reign as champions. Also notice how last night Bayley wore gold, New Day wore gold. They both won too, it’s either this is all predetermined or wearing gold during your title matches helps your odds of winning tremendously. 

 

Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler

Lana looks so happy to be in that cat fight. Happier than I was to realize this storyline will continue after a double disqualification.

And I’m Like… This legit ended in a double DQ, followed by a cat fight. The WWE says Summerslam is their second biggest show, so why not have blow offs to the feud? I’m disappointed in this segment. 

Stardust and Cosmic King Barrett vs. Stephen Amell and Neville

This match was as good as it could get. Amell did a fantastic job even though he looked hella nervous the whole time. Stardust and Barrett played their roles perfectly. I’d dare to say that’s the best celebrity match since Bam Bam vs. L.T.

And I’m Like… Not much to say about this, Amell jumped off the top rope, Neville hit Red Arrow, and the good guys were never really in that much danger. I’m not mad at it at all, I’m glad Cody got to do this for his dad. 

 

Intercontinental Championship

Big Show vs. The Miz vs. Ryback(c)

This match took forever to happen. It should have ended like a month ago but Ryback was injured, and they kept the story going. Originally it was supposed to be about how Ryback thinks he is strong and tries to prove it. Big Show knows he is strong and tries to reassert dominance. Miz he is there to maybe get a sneak win and annoy people, I don’t know. Then later it was about how Miz is in better movies than Big Show and how Ryback should give the title up cause ” that’s what Daniel Bryan did.” I just know now that they had a better match than the story or build. That seems to be a theme of the night.
Since the IC title is cursed. I am not too particular in who I would enjoy as champion, seeing it’s as much as who should be injured next. That line of thinking made every near fall believeable. Ryback won, and I hope we all move on.

And I’m Like… Big Show deserves the Lesnar treatment, he is a once in a lifetime athlete, we shouldn’t see him so much that the crowd chants “please retire.” He did a second rope senton for Pete’s sake and the crowd barely made any noise. Rybacks run has been a dud so far, let’s hope a good blood rivalry happens with him and someone for the next couple months. Ryback is always best at what you can sink your teeth into. 

 

Shield vs. Wyatts

And I’m Like… Remember I had a cigarette and missed this whole match. It’s not like there are any consequences if anything happened story wise. These four just fight each other for no rhyme or reason. 

WWE Championship and U.S. Championship title match

Seth Rollins vs. John Cena

I would really like to rewatch this one day. I remember my cousin, my wife, my buddy and I were very entertained throughout the whole match. Rollins kinda showed his hand when he debuted new gear with GOLD in it.

These two have outstanding chemistry. The whole sequence where Rollins mimicked Cena’s catch, roll back, stand up and AA. There was a ref bump too, the referee rolled all the way outside of the ring. That brought out Jon Stewart. (Good thing late night television makes fun of trump for being in wrestling, here is new fodder) Stewart stalled too long and gave me a suspicion he would hit Cena. He totally did and Rolins hits the Pedigree on the chair.

And I’m Like… It seems logical, Rollins was on Stewart’s show a few times, they could be friends, I bet this heel action will lead to more things. 

 

And I’m Like… Sorry but after the match last night, there is no reason for this. Like there is no reward because the journey started at the destination. “We want a divas revolution, so here are the girls to revolutionize the division, now they are doing the same thing as before. ” NXT is where you fly your wings, WWE is a tight bird cage. 
 

Kevin Owens vs. Cesaro

And I’m Like… Getting a lunch rush at work and have a lot of errands to do before Raw. Let me say that I’m happy Owens got a convincing win, and I hope this rivalry gets more personal. Without doubt this is the match of the night. Hell, I wouldn’t have to even watch it for me to be 100% positive that this would be a good match. 

 

Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker

It’s time to be honest. At WM30, I fell asleep after Daniel Bryans match with HHH. I woke up mid triple threat, I didn’t get that moment of the streak breaking. Plus I’m a Minnesota guy, so Brock is the kingshit.

This match was a fun fight to watch, the ending though. Brock had his shoulders down while having Undertaker in the Kimura. The ref was counting Brocks shoulders while Undertaker was tapping out. The time keeper rang the bell cause he had seen the tap out. The ref was upset because he didn’t call for the bell and the match was not over. Brock turned around to get punched square in the nuts. One Hells Gate later and Brock loses looking like this.


He passed out and the night ended in controversy.

And I’m Like… Raw should be a blast tonight. I don’t have much to say on the match because I am taking a wait and see approach. 

HOLY SHIT WWE take a break between events DAMN. 

i gotta finish my day, this was long. You guys have a good night, see ya later.

-Jake