Mark’s Wrestling Recipes:
Meaty ‘Mania Marinara
Written by Mark Adam Haggerty
It’s that time of year again—Wrestlemania is upon us and in less than 24-hours we’ll be kicking things off on the WWE Network. My name is Mark Adam Haggerty and for the past decade I’ve taken pride in my preparations for the “Granddaddy of Them All.” I’ve been known to host lavish viewing parties complete with cocktails, catering and a strict dress code. This year I’ve decided to do the cooking on my own and figured this was the PERFECT chance to debut my new column—“Mark’s Wrestling Recipes.” This week we’re making a hearty Bolognese-style pasta sauce I’ve nicknamed “Meaty ‘Mania Marinara.”
Ingredients & Cookware
You’ll need a variety of things before we get started, so take note of any ingredients or cookware you might need to pick up from the store—or better yet—borrow from a friend.
We’ll keep things pretty simple as far as pots and pans go:
Large Cooking Pot
Medium-sized Frying Pan
Oven-Safe Casserole Dish
Spoons, Spatulas, Forks, etc
Aluminum Foil
As far as your ingredients:
1-Clove Fresh Garlic
Tomatoes/Tomato Puree*
1-lb Ground Beef
1-lb Italian Sausage
Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Salt, Pepper, Various Italian Seasonings
Pure Cane Sugar
Cheese (your choice)
Once you’ve got everything you need, we’ll be able to get started! Now—I shouldn’t have to tell you that it’s very important to wash all of your fresh produce, as well as your own hands before getting down to business. *As far as your tomato sauce itself, there are a number of options depending on how much time you have, as well as your own level of expertise in the kitchen. I like to pick up a dozen vine ripened tomatoes and puree them by hand over a colander in my sink, but the pre-canned puree works just as well too! You’ll want to have about 50-60 ounces of tomato puree ready before you begin step one.
Step 1: Cutting Your Fresh Garlic
Cutting garlic can be tricky but once you get into a rhythm, it’s really not such a terrible process. Wash your garlic and remove the outer layer so that you can easily pluck the individual segments from the entire clove. Smash each segment with the broad side of your knife to crack the paper-like skin further, and proceed to chop the remains to your desired specifications. I like to dice my garlic down as much as I can so that my sauce is full of flavor, but my mouth isn’t full of cloves. Once you’ve finished chopping your garlic, drop it in the bottom of your large cooking pot and apply low heat.
Step 2: Adding Oil to the Pot
Once your garlic has browned at the bottom of the pot, it’s time to add the Extra Virgin Olive Oil. Add 2 tablespoons of oil to the pot and sift the contents so that the oil completely coats the garlic. Do not add more than 2-3 tablespoons of oil, as it will affect the density of your finished product. Allow the oil to cook for no more than 30 seconds before adding your tomato puree. I like to take this opportunity to add a dash of salt and pepper as well as a bit of basil and oregano, as the oil helps unlock the savory essence of the spices in a way that the puree cannot.
Step 3: Combining Tomato Puree/Sauce
Regardless of how you chose to prepare your puree/sauce, you’ll need to have it ready before your browning garlic turns black—or else you’ll have to start over. Slowly pour the puree into the pot, making sure to watch out for the sizzling oil on the bottom. Stir the ingredients for a minimum of 5 minutes so that the oil can combine with the puree. Cover your sauce and allow it to cook for 1-hour on medium heat, making sure to remove the lid and stir every 20-minutes.
Step 4: Prepare Your Ground Beef
While your sauce is cooking on the stove top, you’ve got plenty of work to take care of in regards to the MEATY aspect of this “Meaty ‘Mania Marinara.” Let’s begin with the ground beef, although it really doesn’t matter which you do first. Add 1-teaspoon of extra virgin olive oil to your frying pan, allowing it to heat for a just moment. Cook your ground beef for approximately 7-minutes on medium heat or until the beef is brown with no red showing. Line a plate with a paper towel and let your beef dry while you cook the Italian sausage.
Step 5: Prepare Your Italian Sausage
Rinse your frying pan and add an additional 1-teaspoon of extra virgin olive oil. This time you’re cooking Italian sausage, which takes roughly the same amount of time depending on your stove. Cook your sausage for approximately 7-minutes on medium heat and place the final product on a paper towel to dry, just the same as the ground beef. You definitely want to let your meats dry before dropping them in the sauce; first of all, you really need to let the puree cook for at least an hour before adding the meat, and second—that’s just way too much oil.
Step 6: Add Meat & Various Spices (to taste)
Reduce the heat on your sauce to the lowest setting and remove the lid of the large cooking pot. Stir the contents for 3-5 minutes so that the oil collecting along the sides might disperse back into the sauce. Slowly add both the sausage and ground beef while continuing to stir until all of the prepared meat has been submerged in the sauce. Continue stirring for an additional 3-5 minutes, and use your tasting spoon to sample the flavor. Add additional seasonings as desired. This is when I generally decide to add some sugar to the recipe, so that I have something sweet to balance the robust flavor of the sausage and tomatoes. There are numerous ways to add saccharinity—you can use carrots, pineapple juice, cherry tomatoes—but I find 4-5 standard sugar cubes do the trick. Reapply your lid and leave the stove set at its lowest setting for 60-90 minutes.
Step 7: Bake “Meaty ‘Mania Marinara”
Preheat your oven to 375 degrees (Fahrenheit) and be sure to wait until it reaches its proper temperature. Remove your large cooking pot from the burner and transfer its contents to an oven-safe casserole dish, making sure to not to scald your skin in the process. Cover your casserole dish with aluminum foil and place it on the middle rack of your oven. Allow your “Meaty ‘Mania Marinara” to cook for 45 minutes. This step is essential as the baking process condenses the liquid sauce into a much thicker stew. When you finally remove the casserole dish from the oven—WITH OVEN MITS—you’ll notice a line about an inch above your sauce, making it easy to see what a difference the oven makes.
Step 8: Add Cheese as Desired
Last but most certainly not least is the cheese, of which you have a few options including mozzarella, parmesan, and Romano. Mix your cheese into the finished product or let it rest on top until it melts. If you’ve made it this far, there’s really no way to screw up step eight.
Once you’re done, you’ll have enough “Meaty ‘Mania Marinara” to feed an entire DX army—or maybe just one Brock Lesnar. I’m a traditionalist, so I’ll add my sauce to some penne and enjoy a loaf of Italian bread on the side. But that’s not to say there’s any WRONG WAY to enjoy your ‘Mania treat! Try it over rice, eat it on a hard roll, or just enjoy it by itself!
Why should the Super Bowl maintain the monopoly on “Game Day” recipes when millions of people around the world prefer the WWE to the NFL? Ladies and gentlemen this has been Mark Adam Haggerty with “Mark’s Wrestling Recipes,” inviting you to keep checking out Cheap-Heat and to follow me on Facebook by LIKING “The B+ Players.”
