Lucky Thirteen #7
Bandits of the Bout
Written by Mark Adam Haggerty
When other sites are counting down from ten, we take it to the next level and give you the Lucky Thirteen. Why? Because we’re Cheap-Heat and we believe in kicking things up to the extreme! Today we’re talking about Bandits and Outlaws, otherwise known around these here parts as Cowboys. Since the dawning of the age of Sports Entertainment, professional wrestling has featured an enormity of wrestling roughnecks who would appear just as comfortable on the back of a horse than they would inside of the squared circle. Let’s start things off with one of the most modern members of our countdown and a graduate of the Shawn Michaels Wrestling Academy…
13. Lance Cade
Lance Cade was a superior talent who first happened upon the professional wrestling scene in Japan alongside fellow Shawn Michaels Wrestling Academy classmate Bryan Danielson. Cade had developed a penchant for tag team wrestling and in 2005 was called to the main roster in the midst of the “Ruthless Aggression Era.” Originally sporting a cowboy hat and leather chaps, he was saddled with the equally talented and deceptively athletic Trevor Murdoch. Together these rugged ruffians captured the world tag team titles on three separate occasions. While Murdoch was depicted as a chaw-chewing Redneck, Lance Cade was cast as the smooth-talking cowboy with devilish good looks. The character carried him farther than he would have imagined into his singles career, eventually aligning with then-heavyweight champion Chris Jericho in 2008. Sadly on August 13, 2010, Lance Cade died at the age of 29 due to heart failure. Two months later medical examiners declared Lance “Cade” McNaught’s death accidental, an apparent reaction to the mix of prescription drugs he’d been taking. Although his career was cut tragically short, “Cowboy” Lance Cade will never be forgotten and was even honored in 2011 by a local tribute show in his adopted hometown of San Antonio.
12. Tex Slazenger & Shanghai Pierce
Don’t go messing with the country boys, because these two future Godwinn Cousins are far more dangerous than Phineas and Henry would ever prove to be. Well, in theory that is. While they’re more familiar to most fans as the former WWF tag team champions, these hard-edged hillbillies got their first taste of fame wrestling as the fearsome Tex Slazenger and the mysterious Shanghai Pierce. Tex was a rootin’ tootin’ Texas roughneck complete with a ten gallon hat and all the appropriate accoutrement you’d associate with any accurate cowboy costume. Shanghai was a bit different as he opted to sport a luchador mask with a singlet—uh, not so much a cowboy, but definitely intimidating in its own way. Although they never captured championship gold under their southwestern pseudonyms in WCW, Tex Slazenger and Shanghai Pierce were also never adorned with the prestige of “Worst Tag Team in Wrestling”—an honor they received from Pro Wrestling Illustrated in 1996. And then again in 1997.
11. Jimmy Wang Yang
Perhaps the most charismatic individual on our countdown comes in at number eleven. Not only is he one of the youngest Superstars on the list, he’s more than likely the only Korean Cowboy in wrestling history. Jimmy Yang was a skilled performer in the dying days of WCW and a key component in its highly inventive Cruiserweight Tag Division. After spending time on the independent circuit and in the WWE playing minor roles, Yang was brought in as a member of the main roster with “Wang” inserted between his first and last name. However instead of playing the Young Dragon whom audiences had already come to know, the WWE was going to draw upon Yang’s affinity for country music and NASCAR in order to create an all new type of Superstar. Needless to say 2006 wasn’t the most progressive year for the WWE, and a white-trash Korean character was probably just as suitable as The Wrestling Zombie or Paul and Katie Lea Burchill’s incest angle. Despite never winning a championship title during his WWE run, Jimmy Wang Yang will always be remembered as one of the most iconic and original cowboys in pro wrestling history.
10. Bobby Duncum Jr.
Bobby Duncum Jr. was a refined second generation wrestling superstar who struggled to make his name after the decline of the territory system. Debuting in 1992, Duncum initially worked as a tag team competitor with the Global Wrestling Federation in Dallas, Texas. Two months into his debut, Bobby Duncum Jr. won his only championship ever—the GWF tag team titles alongside future WWE Champion and Monday Night Raw commentator Johnny “Hawk” Layfield. Although he worked around the world for countless promotions including ECW and All Japan Pro Wrestling, Bobby Duncum Jr. was most famous for his time in WCW as part of the “West Texas Rednecks.” Joined by Kendall and Barry Windham, in addition to their leader Curt Hennig, the ‘Rednecks ran rough-shod over the WCW for a short period in the late 90s, claiming that “Rap is Crap,” and entering into a rivalry with hip-hop recording artist Master P. In January of 2000, Duncum was recovering from reconstructive rotator cuff surgery, and accidentally overdosed on a cocktail of pain killers. He was 34 years old, and less than eight years into his career.
9. Sam Houston
The name “Sam Houston” tends to elicit both passion and pride from Texas natives, but unfortunately for Michael Smith, it’s not the WWF cowboy whom they happen to admire. Sam Houston was the son of “Grizzly” Smith, and half-brother to both Jake “the Snake” Roberts and “Rockin” Robin. Houston was a well-known enhancement talent throughout the 1980s and 90s, working for Jim Crockett Promotions before finally breaking through to the World Wrestling Federation. He participated in several television matches which usually resulted in his shoulders being pinned to the mat, but even Sam Houston had a “Wrestlemania Moment,” when he competed in the 20-man battle royal at Wrestlemania IV. Houston was also in the very first Royal Rumble match with his brother Jake, and though the audience wasn’t privy to their relationship, Houston helped save the “Snake” from elimination on a number of occasions. In 2005, Sam Houston was sentenced to ten years in prison for repeated DUI offenses; according to his ex-wife, Houston had an average of 2 DUI-related arrests per year over the previous decade.
8. The Smoking Gunns
You can’t say, “wrestling cowboy” to a ‘90’s kid and expect him to think of anything other than The Smoking Gunns. Billy and Bart were a redesigned cowboy for a post-modern, pre-millennial world. They wore spandex made to look like skinny jeans and carried starter pistols which they shot into the air during their entrance. Wrestling cowboys were oftentimes out-of-shape and angry, swinging a cowbell with little regard for the surrounding audience members. But the Kayfabe brothers were different, smiling and shaking hands on their way to the ring and sporting far less menacing facial features than some of the more rugged individuals on our countdown. The ‘Gunns would become tag team champions on three separate occasions, owing their final title reign to their short-lived manager Sunny, eventually breaking up and going their separate ways. While Billy Gunn’s career skyrocketed alongside the Road Dogg and Degeneration X, Bart Gunn stayed true to his roughneck roots, engaging in the highly dangerous, experimental “Brawl for All” shoot-fighting tournament in 1998. After defeating four other Superstars including Bob Holly, Steve Williams, the Godfather, and John Layfield, the last man standing was none other than Bart Gunn.
7. “Outlaw” Ron Bass
While a great deal of wrestling cowboys have been based out of the “Lone Star State,” Ron Bass was one such individual proud of his roots in Harrisburg, Arkansas. The “Outlaw,” as he would come to be known, was a ruthless heel during the late 1980s in the World Wrestling Federation. Prior to his would-be rivalries with the likes of Hulk Hogan and Brutus Beefcake, Ron Bass enjoyed a steady career touring the vast NWA territory system of the 1970s. He spent time with Jim Crockett as well as several years in Japan, but was most famous for his time in the WWF. In 1988, Ron Bass fought to the end of the King of the Ring tournament, and qualified for the finals by defeating future WWE Hall of Famer Shawn Michaels. However the “Outlaw” would not advance to the main event against Randy Savage—instead choosing to “sell” his victory to the “Million Dollar Man,” who would lose to Savage later that night. After nearly 20-years in the squared-circle, Ron Bass retired in 1991 and currently resides in Tampa, Florida.
6. The Funk Family
If I can include a tag team as one entry, then how about an entire family? Even though Dory Funk Sr. was born in Indiana, he will forever be known as the Patriarch of the “Double Cross Ranch” in Amarillo, Texas. After serving in the United States Navy, Funk Sr. began wrestling in Texas and would become a promotor in the Amarillo region where both his sons Dory Jr. and Terry would thrive as superstars. Dory Jr. was regarded as a master in-ring technician, famous for created the “Texas Cloverleaf” finishing hold. His younger brother Terry was the “wild child,” much more akin to the cowboy lifestyle of the Amarillo Ranch. The Funk Brothers would make history, by becoming the only brothers in wrestling to each hold the NWA world heavyweight championship. In 2009, Dory and Terry were both honored as they were simultaneously inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame. Both brothers are still active in the wrestling industry; Dory Funk is the proprietor of the “Funkin’ Conservatory” wrestling school in Amarillo, while Terry Funk is well beyond “middle-aged-and-crazy,” as he still steps into the ring today at 70.
5. “Cowboy” James Storm
The only cowboy on our countdown that is still currently active inside a televised American wrestling ring is the 13-time tag team champion and former TNA world heavyweight champion, the “Cowboy” James Storm. Storm debuted in 1997 working for various NWA affiliates and the World Wrestling Council in Puerto Rico. After the collapse of WCW, the National Wrestling Alliance sought to fill a void by creating a weekly-PPV series known as Total Nonstop Action. James Storm signed with TNA in 2002 after working an impressive string of matches with then-tag partner “Wildcat” Chris Harris. Over the next four years, the duo known as “America’s Most Wanted” would capture the NWA tag titles on six separate occasions. After spending a year on his own, Storm would once again “saddle up” with a partner—this time the “It Factor” Bobby Roode. Storm and Roode came to be called “Beer Money,” based on either gentleman’s Kayfabe affinity. Today James Storm is the leader of the cult-like “Revolution,” and has therefore traded the cowboy hat for a veil of secrecy, and his beer bottle for a solo cup of “Kool-aid.”
4. “Cowboy” Bob Orton
Fans of the modern WWE product who are familiar with the “Legend Killer,” ought to know that Randy Orton comes from a long-line of wrestling royalty, including his father—“Cowboy” Bob Orton. Bob Orton was a main event attraction around the country during the 1980s but would become world-famous during the Rock ‘N’ Wrestling Connection. Orton was fast friends with “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, so it was no surprise when the second generation star known as “Ace” was in “Hot Rod’s” corner at the inaugural Wrestlemania in Madison Square Garden. Bob Orton was a key component during the period of time in which wrestling truly became “Sports Entertainment,” providing back-up during several renditions of Piper’s Pit. Although never achieving a championship during his time with the WWF, “Ace” held numerous titles across various territories in the United States and was named “Rookie of the Year” by PWI in 1973. In 2005, “Cowboy” Bob Orton was inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame alongside fellow Wrestlemania pioneers Hulk Hogan, Roddy Piper, and Paul Orndorff.
3. John “Bradshaw” Layfield
Since 2004, JBL has been known as an arrogant aristocrat, riding to the ring in his limousine and winning his bouts by any means necessary. But John Layfield began just the same as many other Texas wrestlers, working for the Global Wrestling Federation in Dallas. He won the tag team titles in 1992 alongside Bobby Duncum Jr., and spent the next three years earning a wrestling education on the independent and international circuits. Layfield debuted for the WWF in 1995 as Justin “Hawk” Bradshaw, a badass brandishing a branding-iron who set to “stamping” each of his conquered opponents. In 1997, “Hawk” joined second-generation Superstar Barry Windham to form the “New Blackjacks,” a team drawing on their real-life familial connections to the original “Blackjacks” Mulligan and Lanza. The “Bradshaw” character would continue to evolve over the next several years and although he’s primarily known today as a talking head for both the WWE and Fox Business, John Layfield is a Grand Slam winning champion, making him THE most decorated cowboy on this entire countdown.
2. The Blackjacks
Transitioning away from the “New Blackjacks,” it’s about time we discuss the genuine article—the tag team of Blackjack Lanza and Blackjack Mulligan. The tall, dark duo clad in black leather were amongst the most feared tag teams of the 1970s, earning their reputation by standing tall atop numerous fallen combatants. The Blackjacks were an AWA attraction, managed by the incomparable Bobby “the Brain” Heenan, and also competed in Texas for Fritz Von Erich’s World Class Championship Wrestling. The Blackjacks eventually made their way to New York where they would continue their reign of terror against a brand new roster of unsuspecting victims. While working for Vince McMahon, the Blackjacks aligned themselves with Captain Lou Albano, who helped guide the already world-renowned wrestlers to the WWWF tag team championships. Of course then in 1997, a “tribute” team was created, comprised of Mulligan’s son Barry Windham and Lanza’s nephew John Layfield. The Blackjacks were inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame in 2006; Blackjack Lanza currently works as a producer for the WWE, while Blackjack Mulligan has two grandsons working on the main roster—Bo Dallas and Bray Wyatt.
1. Stan “The Lariat” Hansen
Stan “the Lariat” Hansen is a performer whose mythos goes beyond the realm of cowboys and Indians, and further transcends the atmosphere of professional wrestling entirely. When the sport of sports entertainment was outwardly declared “fake,” Stan Hansen lit the international scene on fire with his brand of explicit violence and a charismatic streak that ignited something inside fans across the globe. Stan Hansen was the AWA World Heavyweight champion and even competed for the WWF before earning his true place in history, across the Pacific in the “Land of the Rising Sun.” During an infamous encounter with future WCW champion Vader, Hansen managed to clip Leon White with his cowbell, dislodging his eyeball and forcing the “Mastodon” to compete with his eye ajar inside his mask. Although claiming to be from Borger City, Texas—with a “big fat wife and a bunch of kids,” the mild-mannered Hansen is actually a resident of Knox City, and has two sons, each of whom is a nationally-recognized baseball player. During his active wrestling days, Stan Hansen garnered a reputation for his no-nonsense approach to business, both inside the ring and backstage with promotors. Since retiring from the squared-circle in 2001, the “Lariat” has made numerous appearances in Japan, where he still receives the same standing ovation he did during his peak in 1981.
Thank you for joining me for this SEVENTH edition of the “Lucky Thirteen.” Do yourself a favor and bookmark Cheap-Heat on your computer and in your mobile device so you don’t miss any of our countdowns, columns or coverage. As for me—I think it’s about time for this Old Cowpoke to hit that there dusty trail. So until next time, my name is Mark Adam Haggerty and this has been “Lucky Thirteen: Bandits of the Bout.”
