Hunchamania: WrestleMania 31

Hunchamania: WrestleMania 31


HUNCHAMANIA: WRESTLEMANIA 31

Guys…. Guys… GUYS! It’s Mania Eve! The second best Eve of the year (although it seriously challenges Christmas and John McMclane). There is a feeling of joy in the air, of hope, of dreams. My head is spinning with thoughts of the promising matches we will see in 24 hours. No matter how much we may lament the card beforehand, when the time is upon, you can’t help but be excited. This is the best time to be a wrestling fan. And while all eyes of the wrestling world are set upon California, here in New Jersey I am preparing for my Mania party. The Pin the Tail on the Cena has been hung, and the food WWE balloons are being inflated.

WrestleMania this year is shaping up to have tons of memorable moments. The great thing about this card is how hard it is to predict the winners of each match. Aside from the Sting-HHH match I have had an incredibly difficult time figuring who was going to win each match. Kudos to the much maligned WWE booking team for actually setting up an intriguing show, with implications that could be felt in the WWE for years to come. SO…LET’S GET TO THE PREDICTIONS!!! (Seriously though… I have a pin the tail on John Cena).


4 way tag team match for the WWE Tag Team Titles- Kidd/Cesaro (champs) vs Usos vs Matadors vs New Day
I refuse to acknowledge that this a pre-show match. With the advent of the WWE Network there really is no difference between the main show and the preshow. They should just advertise WrestleMania as a 6 hour event. These 4 teams, particularly the Usos and Kidd/Cesaro, have worked hard over the past year to build up the tag team division. The tag titles deserve to be highlighted, and being on the preshow may be the best possible way to showcase them. I assume they will be given more time than if they were actually on the main card. I have heard rumors that New Day may win to bring back the Freebird rule to the tag titles. While that would be really cool, I don’t see it happening quite yet. I think Kidd/Cesaro have a long run with the tag titles coming, so I suspect that they retain.


Andre the Giant Battle Royal
As of me writing this the announced participants are: The Miz, Curtis Axel, Ryback, Fandango, Adam Rose, Zack Ryder, Jack Swagger, Titus O’Neil, Darren Young, Big Show, Kane, Erick Rowan, Damien Mizdow, Sin Cara, Goldust, Heath Slater, Mark Henry, Konnor, Viktor, and Hideo Itami. Barring a surprise entrance, that’s 20 total participants. After the way Cesaro was handled after his win last year, it is really difficult to determine who will/should win. In theory the winner should go on to have a solid upper mid card run, at the very least. So I will assume that the outcome will lead to big things for whoever wins. So who can benefit the most from a victory? Really the choice for me comes down to 3 guys: The Miz, Ryback, and Curtis Axel. The Miz is always teetering on the edge of the main event, and I really like to think he can break through the main event scene at any time. Once he splits with Mizdow (which will FINALLY be cemented in this match) there is little direction for The Miz. The main event scene could always use another snarky heel. Speaking of guys that are on the edge of the main event- Ryback has always flirted with superstardom. Every time he seems to be on the brink of breaking through, the booking takes a weird turn. He is way over with the crowd. He has the look of a top star. He has had moments where he cut potential career defining promos. Time is short on him to finally break through to the main event, so why not now? As for Curtis Axel, he is the long shot, but sentimental favorite. Axel has been one of the most over performers on the roster since turning his Rumble misfortune into a gimmick. A win for Axel could be the push he needs to get back into the midcard scene. With that being said- I think Ryback takes the win.


Ladder match for the Intercontinental Championship- Bad News Barrett (champion) vs Daniel Bryan vs R-Truth vs Dean Ambrose vs Dolph Ziggler vs Stardust vs Luke Harper
I have tried to stay positive about this match. I really have. All signs point to this being a great match. But…man is there a bad vibe surrounding this one. WWE was telling a great IC story with Dean Ambrose and Bad News Barrett, which would have paid off perfectly at WrestleMania. WWE was telling a great story with Goldust and Stardust, which would have paid off perfectly at WrestleMania. WWE was telling a great story with Daniel Bryan that would have…oh wait…they weren’t telling any story with Daniel Bryan. At all. He was just kind of around, being the most popular guy on the roster. Now I have no problem with a midcarder being the most over guy, but Daniel Bryan is not a midcarder. I also have no problem with Daniel Bryan NOT being in the main event. But WWE had literally NOTHING planned for him. Like they forgot about him and just used him. Even up until a few weeks ago he wasn’t even confirmed for this match. It was like they were waiting for something/someone else to come around to feud with him. Was Sheamus not available? I guess we will never know. Also everything I just said, switch Bryan out with Ziggler.

As for the match itself, the participants themselves will make this a great match I’m sure. Everyone in this match (even R Truth) can produce a great match, so I expect the work rate to be there. I have no doubt this will be a fun bout. I don’t see Harper, Stardust, Truth, or Ziggler walking away with the IC title. Ambrose has a legit claim to it and he would elevate the belt for sure. I have heard that the title may be put on Bryan so he can help elevate the title. I am choosing to ignore that theory. Therefore I think it will be Barrett walking away with his title intact. He hasn’t actually been in possession of his title during the hot potato storyline in the past few months, so I assume he will ultimately retain.


Seth Rollins vs Randy Orton
I have really enjoyed the build towards this match. Orton’s return and subsequent slow burn turn on Rollins was a fresh new build towards this grudge match. This is my pick for show stealer of the night. Orton can always put on a great match when he is motivated, and Rollins has proven in the past year that he will steal every show for the next decade. A loss for Rollins doesn’t hurt his character in the slightest. Rollins will continue to be the main focus of WWE programming for the foreseeable future. Orton is hot as a face right now, and an inevitable match with Lesnar is on the horizon. Orton gets the victory here, but this is not the last we see of Mr. Rollins tonight…


The Bella Twins vs AJ Lee and Paige
With all the uproar online about 2 matches being moved to the “pre-show”, I have been looking on the bright side. The fact that there are only 7 matches on the main card means that each match will hopefully get a decent amount of time. The recent #givedivasachance movement has seemed to catch on, with longer TV matches in the past few weeks. These ladies are the 4 top performers in the Divas division and certainly can put together a great match if the time is give. The Bellas will continue to be the focus of the Divas division, with AJ and Paige chasing the title until Charlotte makes her main roster debut. Therefore the Bellas pick up the win here, and continue their Diva dominance.


US Title Match- John Cena vs Rusev (champ)
Man this is a hard match to predict. On one hand you John Cena- who is defending America against the big bad evil foreigner. A Cena victory would be a victory for America. On the other hand you have Rusev- who is the latest superstar to have the “winning streak monster” push. Rusev has had a phenomenal rise to this position. Wrestling Cena at his first WrestleMania is a pretty big deal, whether he wins or not. Looking ahead at the remainder of 2015 and beyond, it would seem that Rusev would need the win more. Cena will always be at the top of the card. He selectively puts people over when the time is right. Does Rusev deserve that rub? I think so. I have seen people stating that Cena will carry the US Title back to prominence. And while it would be radical to see Cena in the mid card, I just don’t think it’ll happen. Rusev gets the win with some kind of shenanigans in another potential show stealer.


Bray Wyatt vs the Undertaker
I have said it before, but I have no problem saying it again. I do NOT want to ever see the Undertaker wrestler…. Ever. Again. Ever. To quote a great man (Hunter Hearst Helmsley) ‘All you have is the streak. When it dies. You die.’ And I completely believe it. The Undertaker has nothing to prove anymore. It is time to move on from the Undertaker era of WrestleMania. Hopefully that is what we will get this year. Wyatt is clearly going to be filling the creepy scary guy for the foreseeable future, so why not use this match as a passing of the torch? At the same time can you see the Undertaker losing two years in a row? I for cannot. I think he wins this year, setting up the rematch/retirement next year.


Sting vs Triple H
One of my first Cheap Heat articles was dissecting why Sting HAD to fight Triple Hat WrestleMania this year. It is really the only match Sting could’ve had this year. WWE has done a stellar job building towards this epic confrontation. Sting has been treated with nothing but respect by the WWE. I don’t think the ending of this match is up for any debate- Sting wins his first WWE match.


WWE World Heavyweight Championship Match- Brock Lesnar (champion) vs Roman Reigns
Good job WWE. Seriously, you turned a match that I was dreading last summer when the rumors arose, into a legitimately intriguing matchup. Lesnar vs Reigns is probably the most interesting WrestleMania main event we have had in over a decade. Prior to this week, it was almost a foregone conclusion that Brock would be dropping the title to the Samoan Superman this Sunday…but then WWE conveniently announces Brock Lesnar has resigned with the company. Congrats WWE, you pulled a fast one on us by making us wonder if Brock was staying. I always thought he was staying, in fact I think the past few weeks of speculation was drawn up by WWE to gain interest in their main event. The WWE is nothing if not their own biggest promoters, and Vince and Co know how to gather extreme interest in their product. Prior to this week, this seemed like a cookie cutter passing of the torch moment, but now with the announcement that Lesnar is staying for an additional 3 years, it’s not outside the realm of possibility that he walks out of Mania with the championship. We can all seem to agree that Reigns is fine to be the next face of the company, but he is clearly not ready for that position. Maybe a loss to Lesnar gains additional fan support, and makes the eventual Reigns win even more. WWE is not known to take risks at WresleMania, especially with their potential main eventers, but this seems to be a great time for them to take that risk. Don’t give Reigns the title WWE. Not yet. Lesnar wins in after an extremely hard fought and valiant effort by Reigns. HOWEVER…. I do not think Lesnar or Reigns walk out with the WWE Championship… I predict the Money in the Bank contract is cashed in at WrestleMania for the first time ever, and Seth Rollins ends the night with the WWE title around his waist.

Man that’s a lot of intrigue going into this year’s WrestleMania. So many match outcomes are up in the air, and WWE is really firing on all cylinders right now. To paraphrase Max Landis “when it’s good, it’s fucking incredible.” I cannot help but agree. The wrestling world is in for a night of great storytelling all around. Buckle up gang!